Capital of: Northern Ireland
River: The Lagan (it’s shyer than the Thames, but just as photogenic if you catch it on a good day)
Mountains: Cave Hill staring judgmentally at your step count
Iconic sights: Harland & Wolff cranes (Samson & Goliath), City Hall, Titanic Belfast, the Albert Clock (Belfast’s leaning cousin of Pisa)
Currency: Pound sterling (for your wallet); kindness (for the rest)
Weather: “Layers” is not advice, it’s law
Sports: Rugby, ice-hockey, football, and the sprint for shelter when it starts to spit
Tea: Strong enough to stand a spoon in. Sugar? “Aye go ‘head.”